Review: World Cup

What- was the name Earth Thermos taken?

See- that joke doesn't work. They took the best name for our planet and the best name of something we drink out of. Globe Glass? Close, but not even a cigarette. World Cup is the best name for Trophy with a top to drink out of and it is applied to soccer.

That is out success as Americans... letting this one go. Letting that great name be applied to a world sport, rather than to one of our own. Sure we have some soccer fans here in the States, but they are weird (ie Drew Carey). Weird in that they like something else. Soccer is the anchovies and pineapple to Football's pepperoni and extra cheese. It's for people who love sports so much that they love soccer. That's not a creative way of stating things, but hell is it true. I like sports but here are all the soccer players I can name: David Beckham, Freddy Adu, Alexei Lalas, Zindane, Ronaldo, Mary Donna, Tim who I went to high school with, Steve Nash, Soccer, Lisa Simpson, Bart Simpson, Patrick Renna and Chauncey Leopardi in a cow field, Hollister Athletics, South Africa, Sport Goofy, Woody Harrelson recently, Pay Lay and his co-stars in Victory (which they fought Nazis with Michael Caine and I forget which side Slyvester Stallone was on but he was a goalie), Will Ferrell's son, Air Bud's sons, Keira Knightley Bending, I was recommended a Stephen Chow movie about it, Charles Miner... I did pretty good at the beginning.

I don't care about World Cup, but I care that I don't care. Caring about World Cup is like caring about a loved one: I don't blame you. In fact, I encourage you. I would say 'better you than me' but that doesn't apply to caring about a loved one. So I'll say: "Sure looks good on a resume". Because this is the biggest sport in the world, and I'd rather be blind to its madness then to learn something new. Mostly because I have at least 2 more NBA Finals games and a draft to worry about. Which makes me ignorant, which is the nature of rooting for sport. I touched on something here, but I don't want to discourage anyone from anything notably myself. Go Caleb!