"I dunno"
"Jesus, why do I even hang out with you? You're only 8 and you never do anything."
"I'm sorry"
"I guess we give and take, huh? You need someone to go see R rated movies with, and I need some kid to keep me in the know with what's cool with you kids so that I can relate to my daughter. Also you let me make long thoughts, and are interchangeable with many different kids, so I can't grow tired of you, I just forget you exist. Did we bounce yet?"
"I bounced"
"hmm. Well, you're great practice, I don't want to mess up my daughter's life. My plan is to get all the bad decision out on you. That's why I take you to cemeteries, constantly mask you, and make you take bumper stickers off cars for me. These are all the fun things I do, that I question would be fun for my daughter"
"I like fun"
"Also, since we started hanging out, I also can talk to your mother about parenting. It's good to have another parent to discuss how to raise a kid with, you know? Plus I'm fucking her. That's part of the reason why I don't respect you. That and you're 8."
"I like being around you"
"I'm not you dad or nothing. We're just friends. I take money out of your college fund when I need it and you eat the yellow skittles I don't like. We're a good team that way. Now, tell me, which one is my daughter again?"
"That one"
"The fat one? Eh. Tell we're leaving... nah- show her your penis and scream 'Daddy knows what you did!', then I'm going to punch you in the spine and yell at her for looking at your penis. I think that will give her something to write about in her journal. Her entries recently have been bor-ing."
"Can we get pizza later?"
"I'm getting pizza later, you have to ask your mom. Ah, shit, here come the cops again- HEY WE'RE FRIENDS. WE HANG OUT CUZ WE'RE FRIENDS, alright... jesus kid yell at the cops with me. Yell I don't touch you or nothing, and make it seem like I didn't put it up to you and that you know where your real parents are."
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