Carrie - 1981

If Justin Timberlake was Sea World and all my body parts that make me gargle were the keys to the rooms that have fish food..... If Amy Adams were the third trimester and me 4 years ago was the baby's kicking... You don't see many Jamaican/Japanese couples... did the movie where the prisoners played the professional sports teams (not the Longest Yard) basically come from someone saying 'pros vs cons'..... I've been holding my breath this whole entry, I just quit because my imagination thought of a siamese catfish, now siamese giraffes. Anywonk - new problem- do I like this album? yeeeeeeNO.... but yeeeeeeeeeee..... eee....... no. Is there validation in the firmness? Pediatric-ally for ventilation.  But I wouldn't coat this album in flu shot cum spray.... with my wife beater alligator saliva.... a layer of my blue man's group's dick tears. But I wouldn't shit on it.

Kids in Paris who sell Hot Butter to tourists go home and fuck said butter and: Feeding Little Dogs

How to be innocent of sexual harassment: start at an early age and spread it out over 46 years

Crooked FIngers - Forfeit/Fortune

"My Weekend if I were a Cage Door at a Dog Pound"

Everyone was working for the weekend this weekend! But me, stayed in, kept the dog in. I mean, yea, I could have gone to the local Uno's pizzeria and head fucked the hostess with my hinge lock all spread eagle- but as a gate, I have a duty. Well, thats not to say my weekend got wi-ld. Friday night- man, the dog walked up to me and I helped it bark at a perspexxxxtive owner. That lady was not getting her wheelchairy hands on my dog. Saturday was bonkers, I was opening and shutting. We got so buck wild the dog peed on me! Also, I heard one of the employee's say the f-word. Racy! Speaking of Racy, the dog blacked at a bark family and embarrassed me. But whatever, I roll with the punches, I'm a gate. I'm open to new things (gate humor). Sunday the pound is closed and therefore the dog crapped all over himself, ate the crap, died a little bit, and horribly scarred itself while an employee did come in and made the dogs go crazy by teasing them with his penis and then the dog ran into me so I had to be a gate to him. I'm a gate, and I love the weekend.

World's largest interior car design tragically burnt in a fire memories: Luisa's Bones

The circus' could benefit from: less accents, more accidents!

VICE PRESIDENTIAL DEBATES!

Remember that movie in the eighties where the new kid comes to town wanting to be vice president, and all the cool kids are like 'that person's differences are their weaknesses' and the leader of the cool kids is very condescending and doesn't give a feep about peen. Then things come to a uninexplicable moment defining, stand off between the new-kie and joe cool that defines everything all at once. And joe cool thinks he's ganna win and remains condescending and kind of a dude on ice about the whole thing, and the new-some knows she's the underdog but still is confident in her abilities. In the movie, the new poop would say something obviously rallying exposing the asshole for being an asshole, and they would win and there would be an opposite sex interest, who helped all along, develop into love by kissing at that moment of victorant. But this is real life, and no one fucking cares and already have their minds made up and won't remember anything about what happened in 2 months. Load the cannon, shoot the cannon, react unreasonably to the damage.

Tippy Canoe and Tyler too: I dunno, your butt

Another thing: I'm going to make fun of you for seeing 'Nick and Norah's Infinate Playlist'

Deerhoof - Offend Maggie

The Peekie Mountains:

-safe haven for abandoning newborns (up to 96 months)

-hidden grave sites!

-24/7 viewings of the MAN SHOW

-kill a killer animal before it kills your family (just like movie!)!

-Everyone looks like Edward James Almos

-Everyone smells like almost like John Edwards

-Everyone sees Jammin' Eddie jamming jam on his johnson

-Rainbow free since 2008

-all you can eat charcoal

-all you can charcoal grills

-all grills don't use charcoal

-nightly performances of favorite children's stories (this month: Corduray the bear) turned into pornos

-the mountain turns into giant polo shirt every night at midnight

-make your own library

-slits

-we're better wetter, so bring your natural lubricaid

Bring your may hens!

Instructions to breath underwater: Basket Ball Get Your Groove Back

Horrible Advice: It's not easy being green

Death Sentence: Panda! - Insects Awaken

I recently asked a contingency of future jazz repairmen about the economy effectacopia, ya know just your regular dude fucks on the street. Here's what they had to spay:

"I went bald so I save solaatta change this way. I eat nothing but viagra, and I don't clean my children. Now- I actually love being poor. Thanks decision makers!"

"This is the best time to be poor, people asking me for advice about being poor and that human contact makes me want to kill again. I'm back baby! Thanks decision makers!"

"Well I'm black so I never watch NASCAR, I have however started driving naked and claim that I'm an alien from planet planet planet planet. The economy has not affected me in anyway, except that I now have dual citizenship with China."

"Crossing the street has become less challenging. I depend on getting hit by a car for my income. Now- I have to pay myself to suck my own dick."

"I sold all my walls. My house is now wall-less. I see my daughter's boobs daily, and I am quite proud of her. We've really connected because her boobs are rockin'. Thanks decision makers!"

Well, as you can see folks, a lot of people know how to talk. Let us be thankful that we can read and that I can hear. Let's use these things we do to make our own neckless shirts. Let's make our own holes. OUR OWN HOLES!

Geraldine Ferraro in the lime light again rebellion track: Exit Villager

Men who look like Hilary Clinton: Terry Gilliam, Curly from the Three Stooges, Richard Simmons, Mike Myers, A male pen